In my work as a nurse and midwife I have had the opportunity to walk alongside several families as they dealt with the loss of their baby or child. For many they walked into their 20 week ultrasound expecting to find out that they were having a boy or girl and some fun pictures to share with everyone. They came out knowing that their child would never live outside the womb. Others came to the hospital or the office expecting to hear the beautiful sound of their baby's heartbeat but instead it was silent.
I wrote this in my journal after one those experiences: Today I helped a woman give birth to her fifth child… but instead of tears of joy there were tears of sadness… instead of laughter there was crying… instead of hellos there were goodbyes. This was their fifth baby but he like all of his brothers and sisters was born still. He was perfect but too small to live. He weighed four ounces and was five and half inches long. His hands and feet were tiny and perfect as I made impressions of them in ink and clay. Together his mother and I gave him his first and only bath. We wrapped him in blue and placed the tinniest blue hat on his head. We took pictures. He will be remembered forever in his parents hearts.
This touching and sad radio program tells the story of another midwife helping her patient through the loss of her baby and the impact it had not only on the family but the midwife.
It has been said that when a child loses their parents, they are called an orphan. When one loses their spouse they are a called widow or widower. When a parent loses a child, there isn't a word to describe them. Every day approximately 145 babies between 20 weeks gestation and one year of age die in the United States. October 15th has been designated as Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. Today around the world people will light candles and release balloons to remember those who have gone too soon and their families. Today and every day please remember them in your thoughts and prayers.
